ORD post...

this is like an update post for me... dunno y i still blog lol... maybe it's juz an avenue for me to rant like i have said million times b4...

so wad shld i rant abt... well continuing from e last post... had a big argument the other day over backdooring issues but aft 1 wk of cooling down i'm back there again... was it becuz i'm juz too easily forgiving or wad i do not know... over dependence? under involvement in other areas??? going out = spending money = no good ; staying at home = play comp all day = no good ... i'm contradictory again...

sometimes i imagine myself being accompanied by an angel and a devil... it's like ur conscience vs ur desire... profound argument non the less but i feel tat is reallie true sometimes... either way my desire is telling me to have fun while my conscience is asking me to FIND A JOB NOW... obviously i'm losing the fight... but e battle goes on i guess... gonna ask timothy tml again abt his mum working at recruitment agency... e bugger dint reply my sms and i forgot to follow up on monday...

oh ya dental ffis are like wtfish... u walk in she asks u to sit down and examine but b4 tat e paper saying ur fit has alr been printed out... i wonder wad will happen if some guy turns up to have rotten teeth... lol...

nowadays bloody slack.... becuz our new 2 ic dunno a lot of things... eg day staff not supposed to rest in the afternoon... 3pm supposed to exercise dog etc etc etc... not tat i care reallie... i get to go off like at 1 pm everyday maybe earlier... staff alr told sgt to give us off whereever whenever possible... but i still kenna 2 search duties... one todae one friday... bloody hell so close together some more... bo bian la... kp also kenna staff subtlely kp back... impressed by him la... it's like oppressive aura everytime he gets u to do things... like there's alwayz a hidden meaning behind his words saying i'm telling u to do this so go do it or else.......... blah 8 more working days... not tat i care... as in abt ns... i care abt my job outside

class gathering soon... tentatively b4 10th dec or aft christmas... i dunno 8 9 10 i'm all free except 8 morning... ord loh... aft christmas prolly and HOPEFULLY i wld be working.... so :S bahx.... i dun even know wad job i wan.... zzzzzz

tried out flyff... finally got a job change... den i realise tat job sux... ok end of the game... haix... it's almost like maple except 3D... i guess i stick to anime doujin and mangas better bleh... still no game can push dota off its seat... waiting to see wad effect wow has on me but too lazy to sign up e us server.... dunno la...

grudge match possibly coming up... big hooha abt it but i dun reallie know e details... a few change in teaming but wadeva... i'm juz there to play... 3rd time alr... we won them 2 times b4 so i dun even know why we shld still need to prove our point again.... bahx

been very apathetic abt things recently... cld it be i take things too for granted again???

audition sea reallie helps sometimes... maybe it's becuz i like music... nvr knew such a psychomoto me can play dance dance revolution type of games... lol but fingers suffer la lol...

this is a very pissed post dun read...

dunno why i'm like super super pms today... lol guy also can have pms haha... super super super irritated wif ppl wif bad ethics... somemore is ppl i take much regard in... it's like when others... ARGH... e tot of it pisses me off so much... zzzz

it's like in a dota match.. e other side one hero dragging e game... in e end still backdoors... i commented "wah backdooring arh" instant reply from another guy who isnt the culprit "shut up la noob" this kinda thing i tot it wld appear onli in pub games but noooo... it's from a mdf game... a grp delicated to dota... so tell me why wld such unsensitive comments be coming out? and nobody cares abt it... i replied "wtf i was saying the clinx not u..." "fuck off la noob"... enough said... my blood gonna burst alr...

seriously i dun understand why i dun like tat place and i keep going back... it's like i dun like to be addicted to games and i keep playing... i'm a contradictory person... maybe i can grow a pussy and fuck myself... yeah great idea but tat's besides e point... argh i'm screwing up my life and i know it... nobody likes me nobody likes e way i do things fine by me... but if i myself dun like it den smth is wrong... very very wrong...

zzzzz